The ransom committee had just finished arranging its acorns into a reassuring pile when a second note arrived. Reggie's kidnappers would no longer accept payment without proof of reserves. The committee responded with its strongest available financial document: a photograph of a tree taken during a very promising autumn.
"You can clearly see the underlying assets," said the treasurer, pointing at several leaves. Asked how many acorns remained available for withdrawal, he explained that withdrawals were seasonal and that the photographer had not been authorised to audit the ground. A second photograph showed the same tree from a more solvent angle.
The kidnappers requested an independent attestation. The committee appointed a squirrel who had never met Reggie, then discovered he had eaten the sample. His report described the reserves as delicious, although it stopped short of expressing an opinion on their existence at the reporting date. Committee members praised this as unusually accessible financial disclosure.
A proposed escrow arrangement complicated matters. Nobody could agree whether a hollow log counted as cold storage, and the appointed custodian kept burying the recovery instructions. The compliance chair suggested splitting custody between two logs. Both logs turned out to belong to the same oak, which was already represented on the risk committee.
By dusk, the kidnappers had accepted one concession: future reserve photographs must include today's newspaper. The treasurer placed The Daily Bond beside the tree and declared the process transparent. An hour later, a revised demand arrived. The kidnappers now wanted proof that the newspaper hadn't borrowed the tree.